How could anyone hate this book? It’s classic, it's endearing, it’s 100% lovable!
Amityville Horror has all the classic horror elements;
An Italian Catholic priest, haunted house,
demons and ghosts,
scary little girls –
It even has a red room of pain.
But those aren’t even my favorite parts.
What are, you may ask? Five little words, in print, up on a screen, the game changer:
Based On A True StoryOh you know the shit is about. To. Go. Down!
Again, how could you not love this book?! Maybe it's just me; maybe it's nostalgia. Maybe it’s the fact that every time something ‘scary’ happens Anson punctuates the moment with an exclamation point. You're forced to read the sentences dramatically; it’s the literary version of Dun Dun DUNNNNN!!!! Fucking love it. Is the writing genius? No. But does it have to be? And who the fuck cares how true the facts of the story are? Get lost in it, enjoy it for what it is.
Wanna know what really creeped me out about this book, made it a truly individualized experience? Before I ever cracked Amity open, I was in the process of working with an architect for the house I’m currently building. To be honest, I wasn’t taking the process entirely seriously, and a lot of our meetings would begin with me saying
“So I had this dream….and I think we should do this….”
I’m sure they still hate me for this. But I digress.
One of my dreams, for this big witch house that I’m building, had a room in it. The room was in the center of the house hidden behind a secret door. (Can you imagine the look on the architect’s face? ohmyfuck XD) The creepy part; the room was painted red. Walls, floor, blood red. In my dream the room was being used for … rituals. Now back to reality, the room ended up being too small and the rituals I do need a luxurious amount of space, so I scrapped the idea.
(If the builders didn’t hate me before I asked them to draw in a secret room – they did now.) If you have yet to read the book, this means nothing to you, but if you do read it or have read it … What the fuck right?